Natalie

I wrapped my long black trench coat around me and threw my scarf over my shoulder. I waved goodbye to my mother and father as they drove away. With a sigh, I turned toward my new apartment, brass key in hand. I walked up the two flights of stairs and twisted the key in the door. My parents had spent the morning helping me settle in to my new home, and then we ate dinner at a local diner before they departed to go back to Forks.



I smiled again at the plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies my new roommate had left on the small kitchen counter. Make yourself at home, Renesmee. I'll be working until around 8:30. I can't wait to see you! Natalie. I placed the note, written in slightly sloppy scrawl, back down on the counter and helped myself to a cookie. I was only slightly nervous about meeting Natalie face to face. I'd talk to her many times on the phone and online, but I was slightly anxious about being in the presence of a human so frequently, especially one I didn't know well.



Still chewing the cookie, I walked into my bedroom. I took in my surroundings, shaking my head and laughing to myself. Esme, Alice, and Rose had bought me a beautiful new white four poster bed and a pretty purple and green bedding set. I sat down on the edge of the bed. The room wasn't large, so it took up the majority of the space, but there was a small desk with a lamp and chair. I had set up my laptop on this table. I smiled up at the bulletin board, filled with pics of my parents, family, and Jacob, that was hanging on the walls above my desk. They had really thought of everything. I even had a chair in the other corner of my room in which I had propped my guitar. That would be my favorite part of the room. There was also a small dresser (I opened the drawers to reveal a load of cosmetic and hair products. Alice.) and a mirror.



I lied down on the bed, sinking into the plush pillow top mattress. I was exhausted. The entire day had been, go go go. My parents may not get tired, but I certainly did. I closed my eyes and hugged up to a pillow.



"Renesmee? Are you here?"



I opened my eyes, pulling my cell phone from my pocket. It was 8:20, and I'd been asleep for over two hours. I rubbed my eyes and walked into the small living room. Standing in the door was my new roommate, Natalie. She was slightly taller than me, with long dark brown hair and hazel eyes. I smiled at her. It was nice to put a face with a name and voice.



"Natalie!" I walked up to her and hugged her. "It's so nice to meet you finally."



She returned my smile. "It's nice to meet you, too." She stepped back and stared at me. "Wow, you're so pretty. I love your hair." She spoke with a very slight southern accent which I hadn't noticed when we'd spoken on the phone.



I felt my face flush slightly. "Thank you." I ran my hair through my curls. "It can be annoying at times."



"Ugh. I look rough," she said with a laugh, motioning to her outfit - a long sleeved black top and matching black slacks. "Since it's a Saturday, I pulled a double at the coffee shop."

I nodded. She was actually quite pretty, for a human. Her greenish brown eyes sparkled. "I had a long day, too. I nodded off for just a little while," I told her.

Natalie pulled her hair down from its pony tail, shaking it loose, and a delicious aroma wafted through the room. My mouth watered instinctively. "I'm sure you did." She sat down on the small sofa in the living room and motioned for me to join her. "Did your parents leave already?"

I nodded. "They did. They didn't want to be rude, but it's a long drive back to Forks." And there's just no way to explain to you how they are really my parents, when they don't look that much older than me, I thought.

"Oh, I completely understand. Forks sounds like it's a lovely place. You grew up there, right?"

"Yeah. I've lived there my whole life. I can't wait to get out and about here in Portland."

"I know how you feel. When I first moved here last year, I was so excited. I grew up in a small town outside of Mobile, Alabama. My parents thought I was crazy when I told them I wanted to move all the way out here." She laughed.

"I know what you mean. My parents weren't too keen on the idea either, even though it wasn't such a long distance for me. Don't you get really homesick?"

She shrugged. "I do. Mostly, I miss the beach." She smiled. "My parents used to always say that my eyes are the color of the ocean. Well, the Gulf of Mexico, anyway." She had a distant look in her eyes. "I love going to the beach out here when I can, but there's just something about the warm, humid Gulf breeze." She laughed.

"I'd love to visit one day." I paused, not sure how much information to disclose to my new friend. "My Aunt Alice is from Biloxi, Mississippi, originally, and I've always been kind of curious about the south."

"Well, apparently you're not alone. The guys around here seem to love my accent, anyway. We should go out tomorrow night. I can introduce you to some friends." She paused. "Oh, wait. I forgot. You have a boyfriend back home, right?"

"It's complicated. I do have a guy that I'm more than friends with, but... I just feel like things are moving a little too quickly. I want to be open to whatever happens here in the city. If it's meant to be, he and I will end up together."

Natalie laughed. "That's the spirit! You are going to love Portland."

I smiled at her. I was so excited to start this new chapter in my life.

Goodbyes

"The weather in Portland looks perfect, Edward. No worries," Alice stated matter-of-factly. "Overcast all day. You and Bella should be fine. No major traffic problems, nothing. Would you quit worrying so much?"

Dad sighed deeply. "I just want to make sure that everything is in order." He grinned sideways at me with his crooked smile. "It's not every day that you send your only child off to college." He put his arm around me and gave me a squeeze.

"I'll be fine, Dad," I insisted. "I've got my phone. I'll keep in touch with you guys every day."

Mom looked up at the clock. "Wow, it's getting late. We need to get you to bed, honey."

I sighed. "OK." I trudged out to the front porch. Jake followed me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me on the forehead. "I miss you already."

I rested my head against his warm chest. "I know. I feel the same way. It will be OK, though. You can come visit me on the weekends." I smiled up at him. "We can take in the city together."

He nodded slowly. "Sure." Then, my parents stepped outside. I released myself from his arms and kissed him on the cheek one last time. "I'll see you in the morning, OK?"

"OK. Sweet dreams, Ness."

I walked away, waving at him. He looked so sad. Once again, part of me wanted to run back into his arms and promise him I would never leave his side, but I... just couldn't. I turned to Mom and Dad. "You know, I can go back by myself. I'm a big girl," I joked.

Mom shook her head. "No way. This will be our last chance to tuck you in for a while. I'm not missing this chance." She put her arm around me and the three of us walked back toward the cottage at a human pace.

Once we got back to our house, I sat down in one of the chairs in the living room. "So, everything seems to be taken care of. I can't believe that you guys bought me all that new furniture for my new apartment. I have a perfectly fine bed and dresser here, you know."

Dad laughed. "Esme wouldn't have it any other way. She and Alice and Rose had a field day, setting up your new room. Besides, when you come home, we want everything to be exactly as you left it, so that you know you have a home here, too."

"Of course, I know that this will always be my home. This is just temporary." I yawned. "I guess I'm more tired than I thought." I headed back to my bedroom. I snuggled under my soft blankets. Mom sat on the edge of the bed. They both kissed me on the forehead and then Dad sat down in the chair in the corner and started softly humming a lullaby.




"The day is finally here!!!" Alice giggled. She bounced around my bedroom and helped me get dressed.

What a strange choice for moving day, I thought, staring down at the long, snow white gown that I had on. The skirt was made out of tulle, and the bodice sparkled with pale rhinestones. At that exact moment, Jake walked in, looking quite dashing in a tuxedo. He took my hand and we walked outside, where the rest of my family - Mom and Dad, Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Rose, and Emmett waited. Even Grandpa Charlie was there.

Grandpa Carlisle smiled widely at me and Jake. "Well, let's begin, shall we?" He turned to Jake. "Do you, Jacob Black, take Renesmee Carlie Cullen to be your wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?"

Jake smiled widely and nodded. "I do." At that moment, he took something from his pocket and slid it on my finger. I looked down and gasped. It was the sapphire ring. Something was different, though. It felt extremely heavy. I had a hard time holding my hand up.

Carlisle smiled. "Great. I now pronounce you man and wife. Jake, you may kiss your bride." He stepped back and Jake took me in his arms. Wait. What was going on? Why didn't I have to recite the vows? Where was Jake's ring? Why was this even happening today, of all days? What in the world was going on?

Jake kissed me with his warm mouth, then stared into my eyes. "We're together, Ness, for eternity."



I woke up with a gasp. A dream, I told myself. I shook my head and looked outside. The sun wasn't even up yet, but I knew I needed to start getting ready for the day. It was almost a five hour drive to Portland, but the way my father drove, I knew it would take only half that time.

Such a strange dream. Of course, I knew that there was the possibility that I would one day marry Jake, some day down the road, but I didn't see that happening any time soon. I knew that he would never force me into anything like that. He only wanted what was best for me. That's all he had ever wanted. But something still just didn't feel right.

I quickly got dressed and went with my parents back to the main house. The only thing I had left to take with me was a small suitcase. Everything else had already been packed. The morning went by in a blur. Esme cooked me a large breakfast, which I ate quickly. It was pretty delicious, for human food - French toast, eggs, and bacon. I still felt like I wasn't completely satisfied.

"Do you need to go hunting one last time?" Dad asked as I put down my fork. I nodded.

"I'll go with you," Mom offered.

I smiled. "Great." I took her hand and we dashed out the door and into the woods.

About an hour later, we returned. I'd taken down a large mountain lion. It was so satisfying. The breakfast Esme made for me paled in comparison, though I'd never say that to her. You need to get used to human food, I chided myself. It would be all I'd have access to while I was away.

I mentally went over everything on my checklist. We were about ready to go.

"I think it's about time that we hit the road," Dad said. I walked out with him and Mom toward the garage. He placed my suitcase in the trunk of his car. The rest of the family followed. I hugged each one of them.

"I know you'll make us proud," Grandpa Carlisle said. Esme kissed me on the cheek. Rose had a wistful look on her face. Emmett snatched me up in a big bear hug and spun me around. I giggled. I would miss my big bear of an uncle. After hugging and kissing Alice and Jasper, I turned to the last face. Jake. He looked very sad, but he was trying to smile, obviously for my benefit. I took his face in my hands and tilted it down to face me. I love you, I told him silently. He leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. "I love you, too," he whispered in my ear. "I'll be waiting for you."

I started walking toward the car, which Dad had pulled out into the driveway. Alice stepped forward, along with Esme and Rose, and they each held up small bottles, and they started blowing bubbles at me. I laughed. That was so Alice.

"Good luck, Nessie!" everyone shouted. I laughed and got into the car. Looking at the faces of everyone in my family, I started to tear up. I turned my head away and stared forward at the road in front of us as we drove away.

Warmth

I sat on the porch of the main house, strumming my acoustic guitar.

"Hey, Ness." Jake walked up the steps to the porch, grinning. "Sounds good." He put his arms around me in a loose embrace.

"Thanks." I smiled at him. I'd spent less time with him recently than I'd liked. The holidays had come and gone, and I was leaving for Portland next week. I had spent a lot of time preparing. Everything over the last several weeks had gone much better than I'd imagined they ever would. I went with my parents to visit the city and tour Reed College. I'd been accepted and registered for school, deciding only to take two classes this semester, until I got a feel for going to school. I had planned to take more classes over the summer if everything went well. My parents even helped me to find an apartment not too far from campus, and a roommate. We hadn't met in person yet, but I'd spoken to Natalie on the phone and via email several times. I had gotten the vibe that she was a laid back, hippie kind of girl. She was studying full time at Reed.

"Aren't you freezing out here?" Jake asked. I shrugged. It was a chilly day, but I hadn't really noticed until he pointed it out. My temperature ran several degrees higher than a human's, though not as high as Jake's. "Why don't we go back to your place?"

"Sure." I stepped inside the front door and found my family gathered inside. From the looks of it, Alice had just gone shopping and was modeling a new outfit for my mom, who was seated on the couch next to my dad. I smirked as I recognized that my mom was trying to look interested but was really bored out of her mind.

"Hey, Ness!" Alice called. "I just got back from a trip to Seattle. What do you think?" She pirouetted in front of me, her A-line skirt fanning out around her.

I nodded enthusiastically. "I love it."

Alice smiled, looking back at my mom. "Apparently, your great taste is not an inherited trait." She squinted her eyes at Mom playfully. Mom rolled her eyes.

"Jake and I are going to go hang out at the cottage for a while. Is that OK?" Jake slipped his arm around my shoulders.

"Sure," Mom said. "Your father and I will be back this evening. We're going hunting here in a bit."

My father's expression abruptly changed and he began glaring at Jake. "Watch your thoughts, wolf," he muttered. I turned to Jake and found him blushing.





"Your dad's been a little..." Jake paused as we walked back to the cottage. "He's been really grumpy lately."

I sighed. I'd noticed as much. "He's just not happy about me leaving. You know, his only daughter going off to college."

"I completely understand." He scooped me up in his arms, surprising me. "I'm not exactly thrilled about that myself." He began to sprint the last few yards toward the cottage. He carried me in the front door and we went into the living room. He had to duck his head to avoid hitting it on the low, exposed beams. I sat on the rug on the floor and Jake began arranging the wood in the small fireplace and began to light a fire.

He sat next to me on the floor. I held his hands and stared at him. I would miss him. Truly, I did love him. I felt like that love was a permanent part of who I was, existing for as long as I had. Slowly, it had begun to change, to become something more than just the love of a best friend, something that would survive regardless of distance or time. He kissed me on the forehead. Suddenly, I became acutely aware of the sound of my pounding heart. I placed my hand on his cheek, showing him a memory. It was from the day I had started to realize that the love between us was changing, less than a year ago. I felt my face flush lightly and I kissed him on his soft, warm lips.

Suddenly, our kisses became intense, more urgent. I felt our lips part and I twisted my fingers in his dark hair. I felt a rush of warmth, of desire, sweep through my body. It felt like I was in another realm, far away from the confines of the small cottage. I heard the sound of both of our pulses quickening. I felt my hands running down his back while his hands explored as well.

Suddenly, Jake pulled away from me and I came crashing back to reality. "Wow," he said, taking a deep breath. "That was... amazing."

I smiled at him suggestively. "It doesn't have to end."

He frowned. "I don't want it to end. I really don't. I just don't want your father to murder me."

I pouted. I squeezed his hand. There's more to it than that, I said to him silently.

He let out a huge sigh. "You're right. There is." He paused for a moment and looked deep in though. "How do I phrase this? Ness, it's just not the best idea right now, not a good idea for you. I will never do anything that would hurt you, emotionally or otherwise."

I frowned. "I know you would never hurt me, Jake. I don't think it's possible for you to hurt me if you tried."

"You're right. I could never hurt you. But...going too much further is not what's best for you right now, for us. You're so young. We've got forever. I want to do this the right way. You're worth waiting for, Ness."

I sighed. In my mind, I knew he was right, but my body had other ideas. I leaned in to kiss him again, and things started to pick up where they left off. Jake kissed me for just a moment, then leaned away. He stood up quickly, knocking his head on one of the rafters.

I stood up and embraced him. "Are you OK?"

He nodded. "I'm fine. Look, I've got to go, OK? I've got patrols." He gave me a quick peck on the cheek. "I'll see you soon." With that, he turned and walked out the front door. I followed him for a moment, long enough to watch him phase and for the huge russett colored wolf to disappear into the woods.

A Visit with Charlie

I stepped out of Dad's car and onto the sidewalk, scanning for Grandpa Charlie. We were meeting for lunch at his favorite restaurant, The Lodge. I hadn't seen him in several weeks and I wanted to spend some quality time with him prior to leaving for school.

"Hey, Ness." He walked up and gave me a quick hug. I inhaled his scent, savoring it. It was still rather difficult for me to be around humans at times, but I was pretty much used to it at this point. He and Sue and other humans smelled differently from Jake and the other shape shifters. He smelled delicious. I faintly remembered having a penchant for biting Mom while she was still human, and Jake as well, as a baby.

"Hi, Grandpa Charlie." I pulled him in closer, hugging him tightly. I missed him so much. The fact that my time was limited with him made me want to spend even more time with him. I would leave for school in just a couple of months.

He released from my embrace and stared at me. "I swear, you have grown a foot since I saw you last." He wasn't entirely off by too much. He shook his head. "I don't understand it. I'm not going to pretend that I do."

"I know," I assured him. "I've had a ... growth spurt." My whole life had been a growth spurt. I was six years old and already 5'5".

He took a deep breath and then we walked toward the restaurant. He held the door open for me. "I hope you're hungry."

"Ravenous," I agreed. But not so much for food. I would survive, though. Part of being a Cullen was playing this public role. It was more difficult for me to have to do with family, though. We took a seat at a small, quiet booth near the back of the diner. Our smiling waitress brought us two menus.

"I think I'll have a veggie burger and a small green salad," I told the waitress.

"I'll have the works cheeseburger." Charlie handed the menu back to the waitress. "And we may split some cobbler for dessert."

"That sounds great." I did occasionally have a craving for sweets.

Charlie stared across the table at me. "I just can't get over how much you are starting to look like your mom," he mused. "You have exactly her shade of eyes, or the shade her eyes used to be." He shook his head. "I guess there are some things that it's just better I don't understand. One thing that hasn't changed is how much she loves you, and so do I."

"I love you too, Grandpa."

He laughed. "You even ordered the exact same thing that she used to when we ate here. Are you becoming a vegetarian too?"

You don't know the half of it. I simply nodded. There was so much I wanted to share with him. I longed to share it with him. It almost physically hurt for me not to tell him, but I knew that the more he knew, the more danger he would be in. "So, what have you been up to lately?"

"I went fishing with Billy the other day. He's been really lonely lately, since Jake has been gone so much. That kid really needs to take a hint. You're much too young for him."

"Jake...understands me. He gets what it's like, living the life that I live. I think you know what I mean."

He nodded, deep in thought, and then cringed at what must have been a memory. "Yeah, I do and I don't, Ness." He smiled, easing the tension. "As long as you don't change into a giant wolf, I think we'll be OK."

I laughed. "That's one thing you don't have to worry about."

The waitress soon arrived back with our food. "Here you are, Charlie." She turned to smile at me. "Ness, I can't believe how much you've grown. You really do look a lot like your uncle Edward." This was the public story. I hadn't really gone out in public, away from the reservation or the Cullen's house, very much until recently, when my growth had started to slow. I was introduced to the people in town as Dad's niece, the teenage daughter of his older brother. Both of my parents had recently died and I was left in their care. Charlie had met me as a baby and this was the story he was originally told as well, though he saw through the story almost immediately.

I smiled politely. "That's what people say, though I really have my mom's eyes."

She nodded. "She must have been a very beautiful lady." She walked away slowly, leaving us to enjoy our meal.

"Anyway, yeah. Jake is great. I'm not exactly sure where that's headed, but...I do like him a lot."
"The feeling seems more than mutual," Charlie laughed.

I chewed my veggie burger in silence for a few moments. "Grandpa Charlie, there's something I wanted to tell you," I said finally. He look up from his plate. "Well, I'm almost grown now... and I've decided to go off to school in Portland for a while. I'll be back for holidays, and some weekends. I just really think it's time I experienced life outside of Forks."

He nodded slowly. "I knew this was coming eventually. I know that you're growing up so fast. How...how are you going to explain this to your roommate, your classmates? Hell, I don't even understand it."

"Well, see, that's the good thing. By Grandpa Carlisle's estimate, I should be done growing pretty soon. I'll just look like an average college student."

Charlie sighed. "One of these days, you're going to have to quit talking in code like this. I love you so much, Ness, but I don't understand." He stared at me. "I just keep thinking that I'm going to wake up one day and you'll be gone, like you were a dream."

I swallowed. "We just can't really talk to you about that right now. I'll talk to Mom and Dad. I'm hoping, one day, we will be able to tell you everything. Just know that I do love you and I will be back." I shoved his arm playfully. "You can't get rid of me that easily."

"I hope not." He sighed. "You're just a kid. I don't mean to dump all this heavy stuff on you. I just hate to see you grow up so fast. I hope you know what you're doing and you make the right decisions for you."

I nodded. "That's the thing. I don't know what the right thing is yet. That's what I'm hoping to find out. All I've known my whole life is life here in Forks. There seems to be such a big world out there, and I want to explore it."

"You're a smart girl, Renesmee. I'm sure you'll figure it out. You know, you remind me a bit of your grandmother, Renee, in that way. So curious about the world. I wish you could meet her, but I understand why you can't. Not right now anyway. Maybe once you quit growing like a weed..." He laughed.

"I'd really love to meet her. Mom's told me so much about her. I'd like to try to meet her one day. We'll work out the details." No matter what happened in life, I felt like everything would work out. I'd already overcome so many obstacles. My mere existance was a miracle. I knew that, with the love of my friends and family, I could overcome any obstacle. I may be being naive, but my mom always said that she believed that magic existed. How could I feel any differently at this point?

Family discussion

"Edward, what's going on? I saw something about Portland, but that's all I could see. Is this just a trip, or an extended stay?" Alice stood staring at Dad, her hands on her hips. She just couldn't stand being out of the proverbial loop.

"Relax, Alice. I was going to tell you all about it." He cleared his throat. "I'd like to be able to get the whole family together at once to make the announcement." He sat down on the sofa in the living room. I stood in the doorway to the living room, a little anxious about what my family's reaction to the news would be. True, it wasn't a done deal, but the thought still made me nervous. I was fairly certain that I almost had Mom and Dad on board, but if anyone in the family disagreed, well, that would complicate things.

"Fine." Alice dashed to the staircase. "Emmett? Rose? Come downstairs! Family meeting!" She almost bounced on her heels as she waited for them to come downstairs. "Jazz has gone hunting with Carlisle and Esme, but they'll be back in..." She frowned and closed her eyes, deep in concentration. "Eight minutes."

I couldn't help but giggle at Aunt Alice's enthusiasm. My mom walked up behind me, putting her arm around my waist. I leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Thanks for hearing me out, Mom, I told her silently.

She smiled at me. "I love you, Ness. I just want what's best for you."

Within a few minutes, upon Carlisle, Esme, and Jasper's return, I found myself sitting at the dining room table with Mom and Dad sitting next to me, and Jake on my other side. Six pairs of curious yellow eyes stared at me.

"I've been doing a lot of soul searching. I've decided I want to go to college. After doing a lot of research, I've decided I'd like to take some classes at Reed College in Portland. I'll probably start by going part time, just to get a feel for living on my own."

"We've decided to visit Portland in a couple of weeks and tour the campus, as well as look around for apartments," my mom added.

I stared into the eyes of my family. Esme spoke first. "Nessie, this is very exciting news, but are you sure you're ready to live on your own? Living in the city will not allow you to hunt..."

"I've thought about that. It will be difficult, but I really need to adapt to living among humans. I mean, I do fine around Grandpa Charlie and Sue, but I think that, once we move from Forks, I will have more chances to live out in the open. I need to get experience doing that. I don't plan to stay in Portland forever. I'll start with a semester and see how it goes."

Emmett grinned. "Little Nessie in the big city. I like it." He stood up and wrapped me in a big bear hug. "You better come home to visit, though."

"We will need to make some arrangements," Carlisle stated. "I'll try to see if I can get some human blood for you to take with you. Of course, you'll have to primarily live off human food."

"Perhaps a unit or two," Dad stated, "but I really think it's best if we try to get her off of human blood as much as possible. It will make the temptation that much stronger, being around humans all day."

Carlisle nodded. "You may be right."

"I don't like it." Jacob frowned. "Ness, I don't think you're ready to live on your own yet. I just don't."

I turned to him. "Jake, in ten years, you'd be saying the same thing."

He sighed, knowing I was right.

"I think it's a cool idea!" Emmett stated again, enthusiastically.

"I'm not so sure," Rosalie said hesitantly. "I have to agree with Jacob here." Well, there was a first. "I just don't know if you're ready." Rose and I had been close since I was born-well, before I was born, as my parents told me.

"It makes me nervous, too, since I can't see you," Alice stated. "It would make me feel a lot better if I could know what your future was, if there was any danger."

"Well, we haven't made a final decision. We're still planning a trip to Portland." Dad turned to Alice. "Do you think you could keep an eye on things, let us know if you see any sort of problems with that, at least?"

Alice nodded. "I'll do my best. It's not an exact science, though."

"We'll still have a lot of things to take care of," Carlisle said. "We'll need to get an updated drivers license, birth certificate, and social security card, among other things. I suppose we'll need to pay a visit to Mr. Jenks."

"I'm on it," Mom stated.

"If you really need the documents quickly, I can take care of it." Jasper grinned.

"I think it's best if I do it. We're not in that great of a hurry. The winter semester doesn't start for four months," Mom reminded him.

I smiled. It sounded like things were coming together. I looked to my left. Jake was frowning and had been silent for some time. I sighed. I wish he would understand that I needed this. If he wanted to do something like this, I'd support him, even though I would miss him. I wish he wasn't hurting so much over this. I touched his face. It's only for a few months, and I'll come visit you on the weekends, I told him silently. He nodded, but still had a distant, sad look on his face.

"I still don't think it's a great idea, but I suppose we'll see," Rosalie conceded.

We slowly stood up from the table. I was starting to get nervous now, too, to be honest. I glance over at Alice, but her face was expressionless. I really wished that she could see my future, but I'd always been a blank spot for her. I hugged everyone in the family and thanked them for their support.

Plans

I spun the globe around that sat in Carlisle's study. Where should I travel to? I looked down and my finger landed on China. I smiled, imaging my mother and father's reaction when I gave them THAT news. Where in North America? I amended. I had decided to go to college. I wanted to be an English major. I wanted to be an author one day. If only everyone knew that so much of the fantasy genre is actually reality. I thought of all of the novels about vampires and shapeshifters with a smirk.

College. I had been interested in going for a while. While I had no formal education- when you grew as quickly as I did, you could never attend high school - my extended family had been a source of great knowledge. Carlisle taught me of the sciences, with a focus on medicine, and Dad taught me music history and how to play the piano. I'd taught myself how to play the guitar. Jasper and Emmett taught me history. I'd learned much about the American Civil War from Jasper's time in the war itself. Mom instilled in me a love of language and literature. Alice and Rose taught me to enjoy visual arts- they often took me to museums (capped off by a trip or two shopping, of course). Esme's love for interior design was infectious. I may have to consider that as a program of study, as well.

What I hoped to get from college even more than a degree was life experience. Again, my rapid growth had limited me there. Sometimes Mom and Dad would take me on trips to Seattle or Portland, but I didn't really have any friends outside of my family or Jake's pack. I knew from Carlisle's studies that I should quit growing and aging soon, which afforded me much more opportunities.

After much careful consideration and a lot of online research, I decided that I wanted to attend Reed College in Portland. Reed was a private liberal arts college with a reputation of great literature and language departments. It also had a beautiful wooded canyon as part of its campus, in addition to being in Portland, which had a thriving urban environment and night life, which was just what I wanted after living in a small town my entire life.

Don't be a coward, I told myself. It wasn't like I was confessing to a murder to my parents - I was confessing that I wanted to go to college. Why should they have any objections?

I heard a soft knock on the door of Carlisle's study, and my father poked his head in the cracked door. "Ness? May we come in?"

"Sure, Dad." He walked into the room, and my mom trailed behind him.

"Is there anything you wanted to talk to us about?" Mom asked. She and Dad sat down in a pair of leather chairs across from me.

I swallowed. "Actually, yes. I've been giving it a lot of thought. I am almost grown, and well... I think I'd like to consider going to college for a while. You know, spending some time on my own."

Dad nodded. "That's a reasonable request, and Portland is not very far away. Reed is a great institution. Perhaps a tour of the campus would be a nice idea first."

I nodded, realizing my concern over how to tell my parents was unnecessary. I didn't realized Dad had been listening to my thoughts. It was annoying at times, and I definitely had to guard my thoughts around him some of the time, but it also came in handy on occasion. "That would be great. I'm really looking forward to experiencing life in a bigger city."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Ness," my mom said gently. "We'll consider it. If we do decide that Reed is the school for you, there are still a lot of arrangements to be made. We'll have to get your documentation together, for example."

I nodded. I knew that I would need a high school diploma, a driver's license and birth certificate that proved that I was over 18, and some other documents. Luckily, our family had an attorney that took care of such needs for us. I couldn't believe how well this was going. I had expected to have to plea my case a little more.

"There's also the matter of your diet," Dad said. "Living in the city, your options will be.... limited. Do you think you'll be able to stick to a more traditional human diet?"

I sighed. It was a small price to pay. "Yes." I thought for a moment. "Do you think Grandpa Carlisle would be able to get me just a little human blood from the hospital, so that I could have it occasionally?"

My mom and dad traded glances. "Don't you think keeping units of blood in the fridge may raise the eyebrows of your roommates?" Dad asked, stifling a grin. Truthfully, I wasn't sure about having a roommate. I was afraid it would be too difficult to keep my nature a secret, living in such close proximity to a human.

"You need to try to assimilate, Nessie," my dad said, obviously reading my thoughts again. "We'll eventually have to move from Forks, and blending in will become more of a part of your life once you're grown." Moving away from Forks permanently made me a little sad, but I knew it was just part of the life that we had to live.

"The new semester doesn't start for several months," Mom reminded me. "We'll have plenty of time to make these decisions." She walked over to me and embraced me. "It's hard to see you growing up so fast."

"It is hard, Mom, but we'll always be together. I can come home on weekends..."

"I'm fairly certain that Jacob will lose his mind if you don't," Dad stated with a laugh. "He's not going to let you go off that easily." This was something I knew. Regardless of where I went, I was bound to my family, Jacob included. Neither time nor distance would ever change that.

Promise

I stared up at the sky, enjoying the feeling of Jake's arm around me. Today was a rare day in Forks in which the sky wasn't completely overcast. In fact,we had been lying on a grassy hill and making a game out of finding pictures in the puffy cumulus clouds.

"Hey, look. That one is shaped just like a cloud," I joked.

Jake rolled over onto his side to face me. "Wow. I totally missed that one." I giggled.

Today was the kind of day I would have wanted to have for my birthday. I recalled the elaborate spread that Alice had composed at the house the day prior - a two tiered cake covered in chocolate strawberries (even though she knew I rarely ate food - I think it was more of a prop than anything), a dozen gifts, and entire tables filled with vases of wildflowers. I was very flattered that she went to such effort for me, but I really didn't like being the center of attention anymore than I already was. Instantly, I felt guilty for even having such thoughts. I was so blessed to have such a tight knit, loving family.

Jake reached out and played with a strand of my hair, wrapping his finger around the curl. "Have you ever noticed how much more red your hair is in the sun? It's so pretty."

I blushed. "I guess not. I mean, it's sunny, what, three days a year?"

He sat up. "I know I'm a cheater, but..." He reached into his pocket. "You're just going to have to suck it up and open just one more gift."

"Aw, come on. It's not even my birthday anymore! That window has closed." Nonetheless, he held out a small black box. I eyed it suspiciously.

"Oh, come on, Ness."

I sighed. "You win." I took the box and lifted the lid to reveal a beautiful ring, silver with a pretty oval sapphire. My heart pounded. For all intents and purposes, Jake was my boyfriend, but... this seemed a little soon.

"Relax, Ness. It's just a promise ring." He laughed. "No need for a coronary. It's your birthstone. Don't you like it?"

I nodded. "It's amazing." I lifted it out of the box and turned it around with my fingers.

"Well, aren't you going to put it on? It's a little too small for me." He tried it on his pinkie and it didn't make it past his knuckle. He paused, studying my face. "Renesmee, from the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew I'd never love anyone else the way I love you. I'd do anything for you, Ness. This is just a symbol of my promise that I'll always be faithful to you."

I swallowed. I did love Jake. He was my best friend, and so much more. I'd never felt this way about anyone before, yet... I just couldn't bring myself to put on the ring. This was all happening so fast. "Jacob, I love you. I really do."

He frowned. "But?"

"I-I don't know. I just feel like we need to take some more time..."

His lip quivered. "Is there someone else?" I brushed my hand across his face, resting it on his cheek. I showed him everything - the first memory I had of his face, the friendship that had blossomed into something more... the years of sweet memories we had together.

"I don't understand, then."

I sighed. "I don't know how to explain. I mean, though I appear as old as you, both mentally and physically, I'm really only six years old. I just feel like I haven't seen enough of the world. My life if flying by like a blur. Some days, I just wish I could make it all come to a halt." I swallowed back the rising lump in my throat. "It scares me, Jake."

He nodded, but still looked on the verge of tears. It hurt me so much to see him like that, that I briefly considered grabbing the ring and putting it on, promising him that I would stay by his side forever, but I just couldn't. I wanted him to have my whole heart, and I just didn't feel like I could make that promise to him right now.

"I think I may want to travel a while, maybe go to college. See the world."

"Ness, I'd go with you anywhere. You know that."

I put my arm around him. "I do, and I want to experience that with you one day, but for right now, I think I need to go it alone. I'm not certain where it will take me, but I do know where my heart will always be." I placed my hand on his chest. "I will find my way back to you."

Jake nodded again, slowly. "I'm not going to lie to you, Ness. It hurts. But I want what's best for you. That's all I have ever wanted." He took the ring and put it back in the box. "I'll be here, waiting for you, always."

We lied back down in the grass, arms entwined, and enjoyed the moment that we had together.